How blessed we are to have friends who lift us up, who speak truth to us, who listen, give advice, encouragement and their constant prayers. This is richness; this is true treasure to have such wonderful women in your life.




Saturday, December 31, 2011

What is a Wife To Do With "Courageous"?

Peter and I did something the other afternoon we hadn't done in quite awhile...we went to the movies!  I wanted to see Courageous because I had heard so much about the movie, and it was at the "Dollar" theater, so the price  was right:)  Here's my quick review of the movie:  It won't win any Academy Awards or Golden Globes for acting, writing or cinematography, but it does have a message worth listening to, and I've got to hand it to those guys at Albany Baptist Church in Sherwood, Georgia, they know how to get a message across.  They did it in Fireproof and in Facing the Giants, and they have done it again with Courageous.  The opening scene is a surprise and sets the theme of the movie.  It is really worth seeing, but probably NOT with your husband...the father of your delightful children!  I wrestled with myself throughout the movie...it was EXHAUSTING!


I am married to a wonderful man...my children think he is, well, pretty much perfect.  He is their hero and the man my girls measure every other man by...poor guys.  And though I, too, think he is pretty amazing, I haven't quite made it to the stage of adoration our children have.  That is why when watching Courageous I immediately began thinking..."Man, I wish there had been a movie like this around when we were raising our kids.  Peter could have been a part of the 'challenge.'"  I wondered, as I sat next to Peter in the theater, if he wished he could have done things differently with our children...if he had regrets.  I wondered if he were thinking about how he could be a better father now.  I thought about the great conversations we would have when the movie was over.  I envisioned it...what I would say...what he would say...I was having a pretty emotional and impactful conversation with myself when I heard that "still, small voice" say"  "Don't you say a word.  You just be quiet."  Hmmmmmm? Could that possibly be the Lord?  Can I tell you that from past experience anytime I hear "hush," it has always been from Him.  He knows my biggest problem is my mouth, so sometimes He has not used such a "still, small voice."  


Whenever I am moved emotionally, I want to DO something.  That can be good or it can be very, very bad, especially when it involves others.  I can see exactly what they should do or say clearly.  In fact, I have rehearsed it for them over and over in my mind.  So there I sat in the theater, completely tied into the characters and the message, and I wanted Peter to be as well.  However, Peter is not a person moved by emotionally charged pleas, in fact, at times, they can be a complete turn off to him.  He hates to be manipulated...actually, don't we all?  But he does like to think things through.  Take his time to ponder before he acts or speaks (a admirable trait I am trying to have in my own character).  This is were the exhausting part came in.  My beautifully rehearsed words and scenes were playing in my mind as the Lord kept saying, "No, don't say it."  "Don't you do it."  Eventually, my final thought as credits rolled was to simply ask how he liked the movie...innocent enough.  "Nope, not even that, Cherri."  So I said nothing. 


Instead I WATCHED him to see if the movie had any kind of impact on him.  I silently graded what he said and did for the next 24 hours based on "the movie."  So at any given moment I might be encouraged because he took Anna to see her car (the importance of spending time with your children...theme #1 of the movie) or discouraged because he was watching the History Channel when he could have been doing something "fatherly."   About this time is when you are thinking "Cherri is completely crazy" and you have complete and utter compassion for my husband.  That's ok because I think the very same thing.


But then something happened...I sat down with that precious LIVING WORD in my lap one morning.  I have been reading in the Psalms but this particular morning I flipped to the concordance and looked up "Mother."  The thought came to me to look up all the verses on mothering even though I have read countless books on the subject, gone to seminars and done Bible studies on practically every aspect and to top it all off...I teach parenting classes, so I am immersed in motherhood.  And I got to exactly three before I realized how much I needed to work on my own self.  The next morning I got to a whole entire one.  All my focus on Peter and his role as father faded as God zeroed His light on my heart and my life, and I was humbled.  I had PLENTY to work on.  Too much to be concerned with "helping" Peter.  Besides, the thought occurred to me that there is a reason why all my children hold their father with high esteem...he deserves it.  He has been an honorable man their entire lives.


So, my advise on the movie Courageous...see it with a heart open to pray for the man or men who hold this position in your life.  I began to pray not only for Peter, but for my sons and sons-in-laws who are fathers themselves.  Pray for your young sons and your daughters' future husbands, pray for your own father, if you are blessed to have him still with you. The truth is they have a profound responsibility and position in the family.   And most of them, including the one I am blessed with, work hard to be and become the father and husband they are called to be.  I wouldn't want to be a man.  The truth is they are growing just like we are.


Have a wonderfully blessed New Year, my friends!!!!!


Love to you...


Cherri

5 comments:

  1. Cherri,
    I have yet to see the movie, but have heard the message is wonderful.

    I felt so encouraged by your post. Not because of the truth your typed words hold, but because I admire you so greatly and I know some of your struggles. When I started reading your words I flashed back to Bible study and the story you shared with me years ago about how God convicted you of trying to be Peter's Holy Spirit. There are some areas in my walk that I've been beating myself up over, things I continue to give over to God repeatedly. For some reason my thinking and my knowledge seldom match and I often need Brian to talk me through the situation. God's proven Himself faithful again and again, why can't I get this lesson and why do I so quickly forget it? I'm encouraged not by your failure, but rather by how God continues to use you (and hopefully me) despite the traversing down paths He's walked us down before. Hopefully the jaunts down these well-worn trails go by a bit quicker the closer we grow to Him. Thanks for sharing. Much Love,

    ReplyDelete
  2. Erica,
    I think back to those early days in my marriage and my mothering and I can say truthfully...I LIVED off the path. Now I wonder off sometimes for as little as a moment or as in this past experience, about 48 hours. The wonder of it is the joy I feel when I realize His sweet voice telling me "This is not you anymore," and I believe Him! He has done this on numerous occasions and in a myriad of circumstances...when the old fears creep into my mind...when old insecurities rise up in me...when my mouth wants to speak before the Holy Spirit has filtered my thoughts. I think about how happy it made me as a mom when I saw my children "getting it." I especially loved the times when I saw them in the midst of that decision..."should I or shouldn't I," begin to go in that wrong direction and then their conscience and wisdom won out and they made the right choice! It wasn't perfect...it was a battle, but in the end I could see their heart was turning around! Maybe that is how God sees us. Yep, we go down those same roads, but the trips back are quicker and He sees and is not so much disappointed we took that path as He is glad to see how much our hearts are changing. And in the the midst of it all He uses us BECAUSE we have traversed those paths and are learning along the way...making riches from our rags! What a Redeemer! No wonder we love Him so!

    Much love to you, too, Erica!

    Cherri

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Perhaps this is the ultimate charge of a godly woman. And just to hear you say it again:

      "So, my advise on the movie Courageous...see it with a heart open to pray for the man or men who hold this position in your life. I began to pray not only for Peter, but for my sons and sons-in-laws who are fathers themselves. Pray for your young sons and your daughters' future husbands, pray for your own father, if you are blessed to have him still with you. The truth is they have a profound responsibility and position in the family. And most of them, including the one I am blessed with, work hard to be and become the father and husband they are called to be. I wouldn't want to be a man. The truth is they are growing just like we are."

      Amen! I have seen in my own life how I prescribe to not only my own husband but all men what it means to be a man of God, without ever having been one. It's positively presumptuous to imagine myself as entitled to that kind of authority. We women have really been the spiritual crusaders in our homes for so long, telling our men that they fall short that, in large part they've come to identify with our verdict. We compare them to other men - "Why can't he be more like my pastor, my counselor, my neighbor, etc" And then we wonder why there is a shortage of Godly men to lead us and to fight for our families to defend us as women. This has been the theme of God's dealing with me over the past year, and what I have dedicated my blog to. It is encouraging to see God moving on women in our fellowship toprompt us step out of the way and let the Captain of the Host stir men's hearts in a way that is decidedly masculine. I recommend a book called "Why Men Hate Going to Church" by David Murrows, or "Wild at Heart" by John Eldredge to get us thinking about how masculine faith can co-exist with feminine faith in complementarity rather than annihilation, condemnation or criticism. It is essential, that we respond to our master in that regard, IMHO ;)

      Delete
  3. Great words of wisdom, Jo! I had to smile at your opening sentence!!! And I had never thought about the truth behind women being the "spiritual crusaders" in their homes...Ouch! I will have to pick up the book by David Murrows. I have read "Wild at Heart" and it is an excellent book! I am pretty behind the times when it comes to the acronyms used these days so I have no idea what "IMHO" means! It took my awhile to figure out LOL and about the time I started feeling comfortable using it, it isn't "cool" anymore:)
    Cherri

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sadly, and to my shame, it means, "in my humble opinion." Just to put that reveals my lack of humility. ;)

      Delete

PLEASE leave your comment!!! We need to hear from you!!!!